couple fighting at home

High-Conflict Divorce: Important Tips

It is no secret that divorce is a complex and challenging process for everyone involved. However, there are instances where certain people can add more stress or conflict to the situation. It can be challenging to go through a high-conflict divorce, especially when a spouse refuses to concede or have productive discussions about the separation.

The team at Autumn Beck Blackledge PLLC understands the complexities of high-conflict divorce. We can help provide beneficial tips that can aid you in your divorce process.

What Is High-Conflict Divorce?

For a divorce to escalate to high conflict, it means that one individual is engaging in high conflict behaviors. Often this individual will refuse to compromise on issues and remain focused on their own needs over those of the entire family. They may make assumptions and place blame on other individuals for their issues, dragging conflicts and divorce matters on for potentially years at a time. One issue that can become a major source of conflict in these cases is children and custody agreements.

Tips For Success

While the premise of a high conflict divorce is overwhelming, it is possible to navigate these separations. Follow these tips from Autumn Beck Blackledge PLLC:

1. Reduce Contact With Your Ex

Perhaps one of the best things you can do is reduce the amount of contact you have with your ex if they are engaging in high conflict behaviors. These individuals thrive on arguments and confrontation, turning every conversation into a long-winded fight. Your ex may even go as far as using the words you say against you in court, so it is best to avoid extensive face-to-face conversation. In these situations, written communication will allow you to keep an extensive record of your conversations for any necessary evidence.

2. Manage Your Feelings

It is valid to have strong emotions towards your ex when going through a high-conflict divorce. However, having outbursts towards them could end up backfiring on your case. Your ex could manipulate or take your words out of context, negatively affecting your outcomes. Instead, turn to your established support system when you need a moment to process emotions.

In a high-conflict divorce, it can be especially helpful to have a therapist or counselor, as they can provide you with healthy coping strategies. It is also important to remember that the projections onto you by the high-conflict person are their personal issues and not your doing.

3. Remain Consistent

With a divorce, there is a set timeline to follow. Even after your separation is complete, you will have to take into account schedules with children and other family members. If you have a high-conflict spouse, they may try to bend the rules and schedules in their favor. It is crucial to stick to the schedule and have established boundaries to protect you and your family’s well-being.

4. Don’t Give In

When boundaries are in place, it is not uncommon for a high-conflict individual to push them. You don’t have to give in in these situations though. Take an active role in your case and stand for what you believe is fair. Keeping boundaries in place will help push your case in a positive direction, where you have more of a say in the outcomes and results. This can be better accomplished when you have an attorney on your side.

5. Secure An Attorney

In a high-conflict divorce, it is crucial to have an experienced attorney to help you navigate the complex process. The team at Autumn Beck Blackledge PLLC has experience with these types of cases and can help you get the results you deserve. Furthermore, we can act as a point of contact, reducing the amount of communication you have with your ex-spouse. If you need assistance, do not hesitate to contact our team.


Contact our office today at (850) 404-7263 to schedule a consultation with one of our experienced divorce attorneys!